Toxicologist Mom: How I Became Anti-Vaccine.

For several years, I was unsure. I felt caught between different sources of conflicting information that I thought to be credible. But I knew too much to believe what we were always told – that vaccines were “safe and effective”. 

This article has been excerpted from ThinkLoveHealthy. Written by Ashley, a dedicated mother, wife and toxicologist with a Bachelor of Science Degree in Environmental Toxicology from the University of California at Davis.

I will also add that I am a scientist. Specifically, a toxicologist - someone who determines the level at which a particular substance is toxic or deadly. (Please don’t attempt to remind me that “the dose makes the poison”. This applies to substances that are not toxic at the lowest levels we can measure.) I know how to read, understand, and interpret scientific research. When it comes to vaccines, I search for proof. For solid scientific evidence. It was and still is, of utmost importance to me, to see the research, and only then, come to an informed decision. And in the end, the overwhelming amount of unbiased historical and scientific evidence - was against vaccines. 

I do not take this issue lightly. 

The debate about vaccines is so volatile, simply because we all CARE so much, about children, about our families. People on both sides of this debate - the majority of them are truly GOOD people. The difference between us is that you believe the benefits of vaccination outweigh the risks. And after years of research and/or witnessing our children suffer vaccine injury, we do not. 

There is passion and frustration on both sides, and we are coming from the same place with that frustration. We simply disagree on how to best protect our children. (quote from post via Facebook) 

I chose a delayed and selective vaccine schedule for my son. I was torn between the risk of a “preventable” disease and the risk of vaccine injury. I didn’t know as much as I do now.

The first time he received vaccines, at 4 months of age, he was somnolent for 4 hrs following the shot – awake but out of it. I was worried, because it wasn’t like him to be awake and not fully alert… but I felt some relief when he seemed to be back to himself later that day.

A month later I went in to get him two more shots (Prevnar & Hib). 

It was then that I found out the nurse had given him a vaccine for which I did not give consent. I was livid. At the previous appointment I had requested a DTaP-only shot. The nurse said it was available but scoffed and rolled her eyes at me for not wanting to give him the rest of them, and tried to pressure me to give him the rotavirus vaccine. 

She ended up giving him Pediarix – DTaP, Polio, HepB in one shot – while my husband and I sat there believing she was administering DTaP.
Pediarix contains high levels of aluminum and I had intended to avoid it.

Three days after that second set of vaccines, my son started showing signs of having neurological damage – he developed some kind of head tic, which looking back, appears to have potentially been non-febrile seizures (no fever). I didn’t connect it to the vaccines at the time.

I didn’t know that both Prevnar (pneumococcal) & Hib contain aluminum. I didn’t know that aluminum has been linked to tics in scientific studies. I didn’t know that aluminum reduces the concentration of magnesium in the central nervous system, which can lead to tics, nor that it destroys nerve cells in the brain – and that this was happening to my 5 month old son. But I know now.

I was still naive, ignorant, and fearful of diseases for the next year of my son’s life. I was caught in between the risks of the diseases and the risks of the vaccines. I was concerned about whooping cough, so he received two more doses of DTaP. 

But as he got closer to two years of age, I started getting more and more concerned about his development. He had several symptoms of being on the spectrum. Language and speech delays, gross motor delays, cognitive delays (for example, he couldn’t understand how to answer a yes or no question until after he was 2 years old), he had sensory processing issues, he refused to let anyone, even me, hug or kiss him, he would bang his head on the couch and into people, sometimes the floor…

He would rarely look me in the eye or smile for pictures, when his younger cousin would immediately make eye contact and smile. He had a pretty vacant expression much of the time. There were many indicators, and I was honestly terrified as he grew older, that it would become more and more obvious to everyone else that he was not a neurotypical child. I don’t think anyone in my life knew how much anxiety this brought me.

At that point I chose to stop vaccinating him altogether and I started focusing on getting him eating well. 

...

Then my daughter was born and my son finally started being able to speak more than two syllables at a time. I found I had the ambition to dive head first into reading anything and everything I could find on vaccines, disease, and health, so I embraced it. I was obsessive about reading scientific studies from both sides and looking into the history and statistics of disease and disease mortality. I’ve never been so consumed with anything like I was with this. It was my sole focus besides being with and caring for my children. I spent hours – every spare moment – every day – reading. I’m not exaggerating.

… I would open my mouth to speak, and my husband would say, “Is this about vaccines?”

It was a rough time because he could not relate to my passion for the subject and he was trying to focus on supporting our family. He didn’t really have time to hear about every new detail I was piecing together. 

The aluminum, the mercury, the aborted fetuses, the chicken embryo cells, fetal bovine serum, casein (milk protein), monkey kidney cells (“vero cells”)… Then there was the constant flow of stories from mothers and fathers about their vaccine injured children. The stories about how their pediatricians refused to acknowledge that vaccines could have been a factor in the sudden decline of their child’s health, even though their child was perfectly healthy and happy prior to shots, and only hours after began screaming inconsolably for days – then suffered developmental delays, digestive issues, recurring ear or respiratory infections, food allergies (e.g. to casein, eggs, peanuts), etc.

There were way too many stories of infants dying shortly after vaccines and their deaths being labeled “SIDS” by blind medical professionals who had no clue about the ingredients in vaccines, nor would they give credit to the fact that genetic mutations can make children susceptible to vaccine injury and death.

There were so many stories of children getting a “measles -like” rash and a fever, shortly after receiving the live-virus measles/mumps/rubella vaccine so many doctors refusing to diagnose measles, AS MEASLES, after the child was injected – with the live measles virus! Most parents don’t know that live virus vaccines can “shed”, like in the case of rotavirus or varicella (chicken pox) – or maybe they’ve been told that shedding is a myth. Yet, the MMR vaccine insert [page 5] states that live rubella virus can be swabbed from the nose of vaccinated individuals for 29 days post-vaccination. It’s been documented in the case of one vaccinated two-year-old, that it’s possible for a vaccinated person to carry and shed (and contract!) vaccine virus-associated measles five weeks after receiving the live-virus vaccine. But the one that takes the cake is the story of the man who shed the vaccine version of the polio virus for almost 30 YEARS.

Then there are the news stories and studies of  disease outbreaks in fully-vaccinated populations… Like this outbreak of whooping cough, and this outbreak of mumps. The efficacy of most vaccines is questionable at best. Merck is even being sued for greatly exaggerating the efficacy of their MMR vaccine.

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I keep learning new things each day. Still. To this day. Because I READ STUDIES – Studies that never see the light of day because the media will never report on it. And it amazes me how utterly brainwashed we have been to believe we can inject “health” – especially when these injections contain toxic levels of aluminum and mercury. It’s amazing that we think we know how to out-smart our biology, physiology, biochemistry, etc. That we think injecting pregnant women and babies with what reads like something out of a witches brew of ingredients – is NORMAL.

There is more, so much more and Ashley's journey and the decision making resources she used can be found at ThinkLoveHealthy.

This article originally appeared at: https://thinklovehealthy.com/2016/08/01/how-i-became-anti-vaccine/.

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